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Two forms of 'why?' - when to use לָמָּה and לָמָה

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The basic and most common form of the word 'why?' is לָ֫מָּה with the accent on the first syllable ['lammah] and dagesh in the mem .  Ruth 1:11 לָ֥מָּה תֵלַ֖כְנָה עִמִּ֑י However, when it occurs before a word beginning with alef, ayin  or heh , it is usually לָמָ֫ה with the accent on the second syllable [la'mah] and no dagesh in the mem . (There are some exceptions for words beginning with heh : it's not entirely consistent) Ge 27:45  לָמָ֥ה  אֶ שְׁכַּ֛ל גַּם־שְׁנֵיכֶ֖ם יֹ֥ום אֶחָֽד׃ Gen 43:6 לָמָ֥ה הֲ רֵעֹתֶ֖ם לִ֑י Judg 12:3 וְלָמָ֞ה עֲ לִיתֶ֥ם אֵלַ֛י הַיּ֥וֹם הַזֶּ֖ה לְהִלָּ֥חֶם בִּֽי׃ Note that before words beginning with other gutturals  het and resh , it is still  לָ֫מָּה . 2 Sa 24:3 לָ֥מָּה חָ פֵ֖ץ בַּדָּבָ֥ר הַזֶּֽה׃ 1 Sa 28:12 לָ֥מָּה רִ מִּיתָ֖נִי וְאַתָּ֥ה שָׁאֽוּל׃